Happy Holidays!

I posted this last year but it still makes me laugh.  Now that we are in that time of year where every magazine has a cover article of "how to maintain during the holidays" and bizarre suggestions like avoiding butter, gravy or limiting desserts, Plus what the heck is low-fat eggnog?  Anyway I hope that all of you enjoy your holiday!

Oh and before you get started Frosty did make it outside, but it looks like he has some problems... when we came home a couple of days ago we found this...

 I Said, "Oh No, Frosty Fainted."

Miss Lu shouted, "He didn't faint, He is drunk again!"

When you think about it though; of course he has trouble holding is liquor he only weighs about 3 pounds

HOLIDAY EATING TIPS

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the holiday spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare... You cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Holiday party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple, Pumpkin, Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner. Remember this motto to live by:

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate and wine in one hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

Cranberry Vodka

So it is that time of year you know the wonderful warm holiday season where we get to spend time with our family and friends.  That warm magical season of peace and happiness....

Right.

Or maybe it is the season that we need a couple more of these

Yes folks this one is a showstopper!

To infuse the Vodka start like you would with cranberries
1/2 bag of fresh cranberries
1/2 cup of brown sugar
a little bit of water (just to get the cranberries going)
1 bottle of vodka

Put your cranberries, brown sugar and splash of water into a sauce pan and heat.  You want to cook them about half as much as you do for cranberry sauce, so remove from heat when some but not all cranberries have popped.

Pour all the cooked cranberries into a large mouthed jar then add a bottle of vodka.  Here comes the hard part... set it on the counter for about a week.  After the 6-7 days poor through a cheese cloth lined strainer then put it into a bottle, I have been keeping it in the freezer.

To mix this drink pour about 3-4 oz of cranberry vodka into a shaker, top with about a Tablespoon of orange simple syrup and shake.  Strain into a martini glass, this guy is garnished with candied orange peels.  Altogether an great drink and it should take the edge off of any family gathering.

 Maybe after one more I will be ready to put those annoying lawn ornaments outside

Potato Flatbread Sandwich

OK I fully admit that posts like my last one are part of the reason that my doctor calls me "fat fat fat"  and I really do have to admit that for me bacon is an evil temptress. I think that all of you are all pretty bright, if you have read even a few of my posts you can see that my friend the pig comes up often, but you don't know the full story... at work we make bacon by the bucket full.  So on any given morning I will walk through the kitchen and look! someone is pulling a pan of bacon out of the oven... "I better try one."  A few minutes later I will go by and there I see someone else putting bacon 50 or 60 slices of bacon into a serving pan "hmm, those look a little more done than the first batch I better try one..."  Then there is always "quality assurance, I had better inspect."  At the end of the day we go through about 700 slices of bacon... no I don't eat them ALL but I don't count on purpose.  I am pretty sure that if I could just walk past the siren song (well smell) of bacon I won't have that conversation with the doctor on my next visit...

All that being said I do try to lighten it up sometimes, this flatbread sandwich/salad does just fine for those *non-bacony meals, when I have something lighter with actual vegetables and other good stuff.  It is as simple as can be the potato flatbread topped with a grilled chicken breast and spinach with blueberry vinaigrette dressing.  It all pulls together well with a nice mix of flavors ranging from the sweet tangy dressing and the bite of goat cheese all wrapped in the warm *potaotey comfort that it deserves.

Potato Flat Bread
1/2 cup mashed potatoes
1 cup flour
1/2 tsp minced onion
1 tsp sugar
chopped cilantro
1/2 cup water

Mix the first 5 ingredients together then add the water,** start with half the amount the add until it is sticky but firm.  When it is well mixed cover and set aside for at least half an hour.  When you are ready to prepare cut ball into quarters, dust with flour and roll flat into about 8 inch circles.  Then throw them onto a hot lightly oiled pan, for me it worked best with a quick squirt of pan spray.  Cook for about 3-4 minutes on a side until lightly browned and flexible.  As you take them off stack them and set aside until ready to serve... I can't say how long they will last because I eat them too fast

Spinach Salad with Blueberry Vinaigrette Dressing
1/4 cup white wine vinegar
1/2 cup olive oil
1 clove minced garlic
1/3 cup fresh blueberries
1 tsp sugar (depending on the sweetness of the berries)

Puree all ingredients until smooth (I used a stick blender).

To assemble toss some baby spinach with some of the dressing... place a flatbread on your plate, top with the dressed spinach leaves.  Lay a sliced chicken breast on that them top with fresh blueberries, onions and goat cheese.

*it seems that I have taken to making up my own words... lets see what happens in a few years maybe they will be in the dictionary.

** I have made this three times now, twice the water was just right the other time I had to add another 1/2 cup of flour.  I never quite understand that stuff, flour seems to have a mind of it's own sometimes

Bacon Peanut Butter Truffles

I have mentioned a few times my appreciation for all things pork, I really am fond of the pig!  It is one of the things that reminds me that there must be a higher power because, well in one  package you have:
ham
chops
tenderloin
hocks
ribs
heck I have even seen their feet in a pickle jar at some of the bars that I used to go to and don't forget that yummy fatty stuff from around the belly BACON. 

Bacon is one of those things that transcends any course of any meal; there is always bacon with breakfast,  Spinach salad with bacon dressing(mmm bacon vinaigrette dressing) bacon wrapped pork tenderloin, bacon on any sandwich.  Then you can't forget beverages or dessert...  yes folks this one is about dessert.

I have talked about my friend the cookbook dealer a few times, he made another visit not to long ago and dropped off a few magazines for me, a couple of issues of Food and Wine, (from 2006 and 2008) one issue of Whole Living from 2009 and a copy of Saveur from March 2005.  Since the whole cookbook/culinary magazine thing is kind of an addiction for me I try to keep the gravity of it hidden (is there a 12 step program for that?)  I tossed these in the back of my car so nobody would find them and there they sat there with the other 30 or so cookbooks and magazines until a few days back when I took Miss Lu to dance I was looking for some reading material for the hour I was about to spend sitting in a folding metal chair.

On our way to dance class

I ran out to the car and riffled around for something to spark my interest... then there it was in the upper right hand corner "Seduced by Bacon"  I couldn't pass on that!  inside was "Peanut Butter Bacon Truffles" Ok if you have read even a few of my posts you know I had to follow up on this one!

6 strips of bacon cooked until crisp well drained
1/2 cup salted dry roasted peanuts
4 tsp sugar
1/4 cup creamy peanut butter
8 oz chocolate chips
1/4 cup cocoa powder

Coarsely chop bacon then put into a food processor with peanuts and sugar... pulse until  mixture is ground to medium fine texture.  Pour into a bowl then add peanut butter and mix well.  Cover and refrigerate until the mixture is firm.

Line a cookie sheet with parchment paper.  Roll the peanut butter mixture into balls 3/4 to 1 inch in size and set them on the sheet, when it is all used lightly cover and refrigerate for about an hour.

Before you take them out put the refrigerator melt your chocolate chips in a double boiler stirring often to keep it smooth, then set aside until cool enough to touch.  Then take your peanut butter balls out of of the refrigerator and drop them a few at a time in the chocolate to coat then toss in the cocoa powder.

The article said that you can set them in a sealed container with some cocoa powder and they keep for about a week in the refrigerator, just bring them to room temperature before serving.  these guys only made it overnight, yes the breakfast of champions!

OK these little peanutbuttery baconey balls of chocolate really did it!  The salty sweet chocolaty candies were as good as they sound!

Cheddar Beer Bread

OK I think I am going to just write November 2011 off as my worst blogger month ever.  The month started out with a computer crash at home and it took us a couple of weeks to get a new one.  Then life went CRAZY at the end of the month with a road trip to sunny Wisconsin, then Miss EL visiting us for Thanksgiving and the weekend plus I had to work the entire time so I was BEAT!  I am going to whine like a baby for a minute here... most mornings I get up around 4:00 to make make my trek into work by 6:00.  On the weekends or holidays that I work I have to open which means that I have to get in at about 5:00 which has my first alarm going of a 3:06.  I know the difference between three and four in the morning may not seem that big but it feels huge when I am crawling out of bed.  Add to that I was trying to spend some time with everybody during my time off, at the end of seven days of it in a row I was starting to get a little addle brained.  We went to see the Muppit Movie one day and the Cunio Museum another, plus picking Miss El up and returning her at the halfway point between here and where her mom lives. 

On my seventh day in a row at work (which admittedly was a short one) someone asked what I was going to do on my days off.  Answer "I think I am going to have a drink!"  Since I think I earned it I decided to take my alcohol in every form that I could. 

Cheddar Beer Bread (shamelessly taken from Alton Brown)
8 ounces all-purpose flour

4 ounces whole-wheat flour
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt
1 teaspoon sugar
1 teaspoon chopped fresh dill
4 1/2 ounces sharp Cheddar, grated
12 ounces dark beer,

Preheat the oven to 375. Coat the inside of a 9 by 5-inch loaf pan with the nonstick spray and set aside.  Whisk together the all-purpose flour, wheat flour, baking powder, salt, sugar, and dill in a large mixing bowl. Add in the cheese then stir in the beer just to combine. Pour batter into your loaf pan then bake on the middle rack of the oven until the bread reaches an internal temperature of 210 degrees F on an instant-read thermometer, about 45 to 55 minutes.  Remove from the oven and cool in the pan for 10 minutes. Transfer the loaf to a cooling rack for 10 to 15 minutes before slicing and serving.

This was the first time that I have checked the temperature of bread, it worked great in this case the bread was moist yet light and fully done.   The rest of breakfast was a mess of holiday weekend leftover hash, really the perfect day off meal.

Apple Pie

Miss El, my middle daughter, called me a few weeks ago and asked if I would be able to come to Wisconsin to see her and my oldest MS. R in their play. They live in a town of about 500 their school is a couple of miles from their home and serves several towns in the area. MS R has been active in her school's theater since they moved up there five years ago, her first roll was a table in Beauty and the Beast, but she quickly moved on to bigger and better rolls. When Miss El called she reminded me that she had a small roll in this one too, the play Jane Eyre A Musical Drama yes you read that right. MS R played Mrs. Fairfax the almost deaf matron of the home, she has a knack for stealing any scene she is in and did well. Miss El was the young Jane Eyre, from her talking I expected her to have a couple of minutes on stage she really was really the only character for the first 10 minutes of the show.

The town they live in (go figure) doesn't have a hotel so I stay in a nearby town, this time I had these luxury accommodations.*


Luxury Suite




complete with Spa



and a downright bacchanalian breakfast buffet

The drive from my hotel to their house is about a half an hour over undulating roads cutting through pine woods, small farms and a bevy of apple orchards. It was the right time of year so I wanted to stop and get some apples this trip and maybe a little fresh apple cider. On the suggestion of MS R I stopped a Sunrise Orchard to pick up a bag of Honeycrisps. If you aren't familiar with them they are a really rockin' good apple a little on the sweet side and have a great crisp texture. I bought maybe a little more than was prudent so it was time to make pie.

This year I am learning how to bake dammit! I enjoy baking, I love baked goods but breads have never been my thing the whole process is too precise for me. I have spoken about my love/hate/therapeutic relationship with well flour and basically all leveners anyway I can probably count on my fingers the number of times that I have made a pie I can count on one finger the number of times I made a crust, so I threw it all in there and made this little baby.

The Crust
2 1/2 cups all purpose flour
1/2 tsp salt
10 TBLS (1 1/4 sticks) chilled unsalted butter, cut into 1/2-inch pieces
1/2 cup chilled solid vegetable shortening, cut into 1/2-inch pieces I put mine in the freezer for about an hour
4 TBLS (about) ice water

The Filling
About 3 pounds of Honeycrisp apples peeled and cored, sliced thin
3/4 cup sugar
Juice from 1 lemon
1/2 tsp ground cinnamon
1/8 tsp ground nutmeg
1/2 tsp vanilla extract
1 TBLS all purpose flour
1 TBLS butter

For the crust
Whisk flour and salt in large bowl to blend. Add butter and shortening and rub in with fingertips until coarse meal forms try not to be like me and over work, for the love of god stop. Sprinkle with 3 tablespoons water; toss until moist clumps form, adding more water by teaspoonfuls if mixture is dry. Gather dough into ball; divide in half then flatten into disks about the size of . Wrap in plastic, chill at least 1 hour (can be made 1 day ahead). Keep refrigerated, Soften slightly at room temperature before using.

For the filling
Preheat oven to 400°F. In a large bowl mix apples, sugar, lemon juice, cinnamon, and vanilla in large bowl to blend. Let stand until juices form, about 15 minutes then mix in flour... set aside.

Roll out 1 dough disk on lightly floured surface to 12-inch round. Place dough in prepared pie dish, spoon in filling, dot with butter. Roll out second dough disk to 13-inch round. Drape dough over filling. Seal top and bottom crust edges together; trim to 1/2-inch overhang. Fold overhang under then crimp. Brush pie with milk and sprinkle with a little with a little more sugar. Place pie pan on a baking sheet and place in oven. Reduce temperature to 375°F. Bake pie until crust is golden brown, apples are tender and filling is bubbling thickly, if it starts to get too brown around the edges cover with foil. This will bake for about 1 1/2 hours. Let cool for at least an hour before you cut into it... I know it is hard but well worth the wait.

*I tease a little about the accommodations but I do have to admit that since I make these journeys alone and the only thing I do at the hotel is sleep I tend to find the least expensive place that I can. This hotel though lacking in luxuries is a clean place owned by a nice family.

Grilled Salad

We finally broke down and got it, yesterday Kris picked up the new desktop (we still think the laptop may be recoverable). The desktop however was never that great to begin with. I replaced the graphics card three times in the 5 years that we had it, plus it was doing all kinds of crazy stuff... every few mornings I woke up to find a blue screen taunting me and if you bumped the tower the entire thing would shut down and take about 25 minutes to boot up again.


Wow computers have changed in the last few years, I had to look up what a terabyte was, plus this thing has a wide screen and speakers that are a little bigger than a couple of dry erase markers but sound great! and the color is as good as our TV. So I am spending some time learning the ins and outs of this fancy pants new technology. So my plan over the next couple of days is to visit all of my blogger friends, and get a post in. I feel like I have been out for so long and I have found that work computers don't always play well with blog websites, I swear if I see that flippity flappin Barracuda logo again I am going to scream.

Anyway, a couple of weeks ago I was on my typical summer grilling bender, grilled meat, grilled sweet potatoes then grilled dessert. I made a joke about having grilled everything except salad... well this is it:

Grilled autumn salad (serves 2)
2 Romaine Hearts cut in half
1 Small head of radicchio quartered
1 Fennel bulb halved
2 Apples cored and diced*
Sprinkle of shredded Cheddar

1 Cup Croutons

Apple Cider dressing

For the croutons
Dice up some French bread (I keep a bag in the freezer but if you are just making this dice up a cup of it)
1 TBLS butter
1 clove of garlic minced
salt and pepper to taste
sprinkle of Parmesan cheese

Melt butter in a skillet over medium heat, add garlic and cook until translucent. Put in the cubed bread and toss until coated. Add salt and pepper and continue to cook stirring occasionally until crispy (took me about 15 minutes)** While they are still hot add the Parmesan cheese and toss again

For the dressing
1/2 cup Olive Oil
1/3 cup Apple Cider*
1 TBLS Balsamic vinegar
1 tsp Dijon mustard
1 clove garlic minced
1 TBLS fresh fennel frond cut up

Put into a cup and hit with your handy emersion blender, set aside. This can be made a day ahead if you like.

Now here is how it all goes together light your grill and put the halved fennel bulb on, after that has been going for about 10 minutes add the radicchio then the Romaine hearts grill until everything is a little charred around the edges.

To serve:
Place the Romaine heart halves on your plate the top with sliced radicchio and the sliced fennel. Add the diced apples, fresh hot croutons then the cider dressing and cheese. I used cheddar because that is what i had in the kitchen but I think feta or goat cheese might have worked better.

*I used Honeycrisp apples and cider (next entry will explain why) but any crisp sweet apple will work
** You could make the croutons ahead but let’s face it warm croutons are sexy and you know it!